I am 22, going on 23....right smack dab in the middle of what the New York Times article referred to as the "20-Somethings." According to the article, many young adults are experimenting and exploring during this stage of life, chasing adventure and figuring out the ups and downs that--supposedly--will set them on the right track for their future.
In some ways, I guess I'm the typical 20-something. I have a bachelor's degree, have been to Europe twice in the last year, and am heading over to Germany again with a Fulbright (aka, a prestigious time filler). Since graduating in June, I've held the same part-time job I've worked since high school and have lived at my parents' house, under my parents' insurance, eating my parents' food. I'm not financially independent.
And although I DO have a career plan and ideas of what I want to do for the rest of my life, I have yet to encounter the "primary psychological challenge" of this time period in my life. As the Times put it, "deciding whether to commit to a lifelong intimate relationship and choosing the person to commit to."
Alas, if it were only that simple. As if I could simply walk up to a line of eligible candidates and choose the person I want to commit my life to.
Intimacy has a nice ring to it; it's something that my very nature, along with the majority--if not all--of the human race, craves. Today, two dear friends (one since childhood and another close for the last two years) celebrated their marriages to their life partners. Watching my friend walk down the aisle, her white dress fluttering in the breeze drifting across our bare shoulders, I thought about how I'd like a wedding like that someday. A best friend, life long companion, intimate partner: I'd like it all, please.
So as far as choosing to commit, I've got that covered. It's just that the right person hasn't shown up yet.
And what's a girl supposed to do? Apparently, as a typical "20-something," I've got a host of other challenges on my plate. I can't stop my life until I can mark the little box. Wedding? Check!
I've always resented the thought of being studied, though. Maybe it was inherent fear, being the daughter of a psychologist, that my every move was somehow being analyzed. However, I want to fill these years to their fullest potential, not be stuck in a rut because I can't mark marriage off my list...yet.
In some respects, I'd like a little more credit than the Times seems to allot to my generation. We're all different, placed in circumstances that vary across economic and cultural lines, and it's really, really hard to lump us into one broad category. Period.
The final quote in the article was more to my liking: "To be a young American today is to experience both excitement and uncertainty, wide-open possibility and confusion, new freedoms and new fears...emerging adults develop skills for daily living, gain a better understanding of who they are and what they want from life and begin to build a foundation for their adult lives."
Sounds good to me.
